Habitualchaos

Just got back from the families annual trek to Lake Erie, more than a few hours ago. The trip, technically, was Saturday to Saturday... but mommy + daddy wanted a day or two to themselves, so I had a few days to wait. My sisters family went up Monday afternoon/evening... but since I wasnt getting paid for this vacation, (long story) I drove up Tuesday morning/afternoon after putting in a day of work on Monday.

Sadly, theres not a lot to report from vacation. It was mainly your garden variety vegging vacation; lotsa swimming, lotsa cookouts, lotsa napping... with a little fishing and some waverunner riding tossed to make it complete. Sadly since my camera isnt waterproof, I couldnt get any snapshots of the hour-long waverunner ride I got to take around the Bay. Considering the (mainly) boring activities that were involved... I actually didnt take many many pictures, clearly not enough for a picturejournal

I didn take enough for this homemade panoramic view of the place where we were staying. I also took a couple new videos when we made a stop at a Safari Wildlife place right after we left the cabin to come home... little last minute stop to entertain my niece + nephew and "extend" vacation just a tad before coming home.

All in all... a nice time was had by all. Even after all of us getting sunburned enough that we essentially couldnt go swimming the last day we were there... it was a good enough time, to make having to come home really really painful.

Although considerable time has passed since... J can never forget the monumentous time he won the day, and saved children all over the world, by sinking a hole-in-one on the Par 3 Great Green Penis...

Such was a great day for all who occasionally, by fault of their own imagination, happen upon bodily-organ shaped golf holes everywhere.

After finishing some take-out before our night of poker this past Saturday... all of us decided, obviously, to open our fortune cookies. I dont remember what mine actually said... but after my bud Devon opened his, he insisted that he must have picked up mine.

I dunno... but I think he was right.

For the past 7 days, Ive been sort-of babysitting at my uncles house. He called me a few weeks ago and asked if I wanted to play the responsible adult ans watch his house while he went on vacation for 10 days. The catch, as there always is one, was that I would be occupying the house with his 16 + 18 yr old step-kids... to kind-of keep an eye on them essentially.

Even now, as Im sitting here at work with 2 more days to go, I have no idea why I agreed to do this. He kept assuring me he didnt think Id have any problems staying there. I even made some weak attempt to get out of it... telling him I didnt know how long Id be around the house, because of work and my (even as limited as it is) social life.

Its not like I havent had some problems already... I mean, we are talking about 16 + 18 yr old kids; even I wasnt so naive to think this would be smooth. Im gonna sound like one of my parents here... as the problems Ive had involve (you prolly guessed it) beer, mischief and loud teenagers. So far it hasnt been anything I couldnt handle... so Im just hoping the next 2 days go off without a hitch.

Course Sunday (the day Im done) is only one day from Monday... signifying the beginning of my 1st semester back in college and start a hellish schedule of school + work for the next 16 weeks. That was another reason why Id thought I didnt wanna do this babysitting gig... even though for some unknown reason, I went through with it.

I do know a couple things though...

1. I cant wait for it to be over


2. Im definitely not doing this again


3. I never realized how much Id miss my normal routine


4. I miss my broadband Internet connection at home


5. I miss the cable TV channels I have memorized at home, and


6. I really need to get a good laptop plan going

This concludes my list of realizations, and in two days (even with a hellish schedule) Im gonna enjoy the shit outta my normal routine... with my broadband Internet connection. AOL dialup sucks my great white ass... amen.

Ive mentioned on a couple occasions my intentions and subsequent decision to go back to school, since Im staying at home and wouldnt get this chance if I wasnt.

About a month ago or so, I got a bill in the mail for the first part of the semester, equalling $821 I owed to my alma mater. I called the school shortly after receiving that bill... considering Id just recently applied for financial aid cause I dont have any spare money, let alone $821. The lady I talked to at least sounded understanding about the fact I didnt have the money, and my financial aid stuff was still in limbo... although she couldnt really do anything about it.

She informed me, after I told her of the absolute certainty I wouldnt make the due date for the $821, that Id have to suck up a $20 late fee and $10 service fee for not making the due date. After she said it, I just thought to myself "hmmm... $821 I dont have or $30 in fees since I dont have the money anyway." Not much of a trade there, so taking the late fees wasnt that big-a deal to me.

That would have been fine there, if she hadnt told me right after that... that if I didnt meet their next billing cycle I could either be sent to collections or be removed from school altogether. Oh wasnt that nice! Right about that time I remembered I still had just under $800 in freelance money thats still owed to me by my current employer... so I wasnt sweating quite as juch right after that. Id still have to take the late + service fees, but that was still cool with me.

Since then Ive been reminding my current employer that I absolutely need that money, to little success as of Friday. That urgency has, recently, taken a much more urgent turn after checking my mail from yesterday (since Ive been at my uncles most of the week). I got a bill for the next billing cycle and although the before mentioned $30 in fees is there... another $800 or so has been tacked on as well, making the grand total I owe now over $1600.

I had just stopped sweating so much, realizing I had the money (after I could get it off my employer)... and now Im back to sweating and worrying over the extra $800 thats been added. If Id had a little warning that the other wad of cash would be added, I wouldve tried to get the freelance money much much earlier than I have now.

Im, by no means, dead in the water though. I still have the almost $800 in freelance money, and considering living at home for the moment... I have more money than ever I can squeeze outta my "salary" to make up for it.

I still may need to borrow some money off my parents to assist me before my financial aid comes through... but it was quite a shock after tearing open that envelope this afternoon.

Had a few things to say over the last couple of days... but Ive been enduring no internet connection at my uncles house, and dealing with a few other things. So, Im just gonna cram the last couple days into a few short, and most likely, vague points...

1. As mentioned before, Ive been house/baby sitting at my uncles house for the past 10 days... essentially keeping an eye on his house and his two teenage step-kids while hes been away on vacation. It was a weird experience, and Im glad its over... thats all I gotta say.

2. I start school tonight. Its an odd feeling going back, mainly because of the struggle I had just getting out the first time. I dont know how I feel yet... but I know my mom wishes I was a little more optimistic. Part of me wishes I was too, but the cynical side of me keeps pushing thoughts of not knowing if this is gonna be worth it or not. Its tough to explain... Im nervous, somewhat excited, nervous, looking forward to what this could do for me and nervous.

It could be the uncertainty of my future, it could be everything thats happened up to this point (what led me here) or it could be the $10,000 Im gonna be spending to get through this... this is gonna be a weird ride though, I just got that feeling.

3. I went for a bike ride for the first time in about a year yesterday. Staying at my uncles put me very close to the woods I used to ride in when I lived in that area... and I couldnt pass up an opportunity to get back out there. It was just as I remembered it... exhilerating and exhausting at the same time. It was so nice getting back to something I love doing... and disheartening too, thinking that Ive waited this long to get back to it. When I got done with that ride though, I was out-of-breath... tired... achey... light-headed... sweaty... and loving every fucking minute of it.

4. Considering my absence from home, doing my little house/baby sitting thing for the past 10 days... I havent checked my email every day on both my computers. I usually only had the time to check the email on my PC, not getting around to my Mac before I left to go back to my uncles house. I just checked my email on my Mac... cause this is the computer I do all my designing on and I needed to check some files I sent myself from work (since I work from home Mon + Wed). From the 19th of this month (the last day I checked my email on this machine) to this morning... I ended up with 883 (thats not a mistype) new emails (since I get so much fucking spam) and I deleted 877 of them cause they were junk.

This concludes our broadcast day... wish me luck on my first day of school.

The following is a list of a few reasons I was thinking, and have subsequently decided to not remain a college student for right now (in no particular order)...

One. Early on in my travels, learning about my options for going back to school... I was informed that since I already have a BFA in whatever, I am unelligible for any student aid aside from Stafford Loans (which didnt really surprise me, so this isnt quite a reason I withdrew from school).

Two. I was always, very much, more interested in the Masters degree in Web Communications the university had under proposal. That was, of course, the bad part... it was (and still is) under proposal until prolly late next year. That wouldnt have been a big problem... but ever since I started inquiring about school (roughly 2 months ago), no ones been able to tell me if any classes I was gonna take towards my certificates would transfer over to the Masters (if it got approved). That, essentially, meaning I could take all nine classes for my two certificates and less than half could work towards the Masters program.

Three. The day after class started, I found out that since the certificates I was going for are not specifically a degree-seeking program (theyre only certificates, not degrees) that I would unelligible for even Stafford Loans to help me pay for school. Without any financial aid, theres no way for me to go back.

After learning that, my advisor suggested transfering into the Bachelor of Science program for a 4 yr. degree in Information Technology to "fool" the loan people so I could get financial aid. Take the classes I just needed for the certificates and leave after applying for them... which ended uop what I was gonna try.

Four. The Office of Financial Aid at YSU was so bogged down with requests for financial aid, there was no guarantee I would get my financial aid in time for the next billing cycle of the Bursars office. I could (prolly) handle the first billing cycle (with the before mentioned freelance money still owed, and a little help from the folks)... but much more past that, I would be totally screwed. I was already running the risk of not meeting the first billing cycle... so I didnt have any options there.

Five. My original plan, before I was gonna go back to school... was to make the attempt to learn this stuff on my own. To sit my pudgy ass down and try to nail some stuff down... reading some books, talking to programmer friends of mine for assistance, etc. The only problem with that plan was that I never actually sat down and tried before just deciding on going to school. I have somt time, waiting to see if theyre proposed Masters program goes through... to try this on my own, or simply get other experience while I wait; or more to the point... both.

Six. I found out, in my travels today withdrawing from school... that theres yet another question in my elligibility for Stafford Loans. Taking into my advisors suggestion of saying I wanted a BSAS in Information Technology... since I already have a BFA in Graphic Design; if I wanted to for a new 4 yr degree, it would have to be in a completely different/unrelated dept than my current degree. She couldnt give a straight answer if the degree in Info Tech was far enough away from my current degree (considering "screwy" government guidelines as she put it)... to get my student loans.

There are a little too many "ifs" at this point for me to blindly spend $10,000... at least until I can get a clearer picture on what I want more anyway, that Masters. And for now, why spend the money for those certificates when I dont know if I could learn this stuff on my own for much much less than that.

I know where I want to be, I know what I want to eventually know... its just the path to those thats what I gotta figure out. If it makes more sense after some time to go back to school, I am all for going back... if its makes more sense to stay away for now, I am just as comfortable.

And in this time, I can eliminate some debt... and thats always nice.

Since the 27th of this month, till tomorrow (being Labor Day) the (insert big number)th Annual Canfield Fair has been going on. Its, obviously by its name, an annual Fair (a very big one I might add) that runs for about a week... boasting high food prices, animals, souvenir shops, advertisers, local TV stations + the best (and worst) of the community wandering around.

I dont normally go every year, as really the only thing thats interested me over the years was the food. Not that it doesnt have its charm, as Ive gotten older though... the rides lose their interest, and the little trinket stands do as well. Well, actually I take that back... they dont exactly lose their interest, as I still love doing stupid shit like that; I just dont do it as much as when I was younger. Id usually do the go-with-a-gang-of-friends thing and wander around eating and not doing much else. Such was the case this year... going out with my buds Marc + Devon.

Doing a little walking around, eating DiRussos Sausage sandwiches (my favorite Fair food) and stopping at almost all the Lemon Shake stands (my favorite Fair drink). With all the varieties of food, oddly enough I got to try a deep-fried Twinkie...

Id heard of the deep-fried candy bars on some Discovery Channel thing, least I think thats where I heard of them from. Never heard of a deep-fried Twinkie though, and since the curiosity got the better of me... I had to try one. Its an interesting taste, not bad at all... like a warm-icing filled cake. Lord knows I wouldnt make a habit out of them, as they must be heavy on the fat; and I really dont need any more hanging off me.

The rest of the day wasnt enormously interesting, just more walking around... with the occasional stop at a Lemon Shake stand so I could continue my obsession.

Course, now that I remember; Marc did get a pretty good kick outta the old man we saw riding around on a scooter... with his cane sticking out of his ass.